It’s been a while since the last guest post around here! Since I want this blog to be a diary to look back on rather than just a record of what I’ve worn and brands I’ve worked with, I bring you a slightly unconventional one today. By George of ‘can I write a blog for you‘ Joli House fame, and sidekick James. Well, it kind of worked out the other way round, but never mind. The starting topic (given by yours truly): What You Don’t Get About Girls. Quickly deviated from that one though! Interviewing 17 year old boys is kind of like interviewing frogs in that they’re all over the place, so bear with. The ‘interview’ (that sounds ridiculous haha) started as a group messenger on Facebook, and ended up us all round at my house ‘interviewing’ and laughing about old stuff and catching up at 11pm on a Sunday night. As you do. Oh and the Chuckle Brothers image is because I don’t have any recent photos of the two of them, so y’know, had to improvise. If your tastes sway more toward conservative, there are other posts on this blog you’re probably better off reading. Without further ado, the (slightly abridged, but not much ’cause keeping it real) interview, for those of you who care for an insight into the mind of almost-adult-age boys:
George: Why do girls care if you see them in underwear but not a bikini when its practically the same thing? Also what the hell is the point in thongs haha. And why are all girls emotional? Why do chickens lay eggs
**See what I mean about the frogs?**
Lily: Gonna have to explain that metaphor George
James: The point of thongs is they’re v nice to look at and there is no vpl if you’re wearing tight clothes.
Lily: James knows the girly things! And the ‘point’ is kind of that there is no point. Just like there’s no ‘point’ in lacy underwear rather than just plain. Re: emotions, I’d say I’ve met a fair few emotional guys!
George: I like lacy underwear
Lily: Girls feel like they’ve got it together if they’re wearing a nice set of matching underwear. It’s not about impressing someone
Lily: Are relationships a good idea at our age?
James: Probably not the best person to ask right now hahaha
George: I think anything under 16 is pretty pointless, its a small percentage of people that stay in a relationship for over about 3 years , it just doesn’t work as we are still growing and finding ourselves etc etc, v soppy! but if you feel that you love someone then why not give it a shot but I’m enjoying being single atm
George: What catches your eye?
Lily: Smiles & grins, defo
George: You like boys who smile
Lily: Well the full on grin thing will catch my eye, people who actually look like they’re enjoying themselves
George: Everyone smiles though at some point
George: Looks or personality? What is your favourite book/film?
Lily: Apparently I have quite a quirky taste in looks anyway, so typically ‘good looking’ might not be my thing. NGL tall guys tho
George: 6″3 here !!! lol jk
George: If you could go anywhere in the world, where would you go?
James: Bahamas, and in a girl I initially look for looks, gotta be at least 9/10 for me
James: Shouldn’t we do this interview face to face?
Lily: I like your honesty james
George: Yes a vlog!!!
James: Once the initial attraction is there, then I’ll dig deeper
George: Most people do though don’t they, they lie if they say its all about personality
Lily: Well I’ve got a GoPro here until tomorrow
George: Not a place in general but a three month long road trip through every state in america in an RV
James: And to get past just attraction they gotta be nice, be incredibly affectionate as I’m like a puppy, funny, have something about them like a talent
George: Just answered my own question
George: I agree james
Lily: hahaha I’d say pretty much the same George! Read my mind
James: Oh yeah that’s my dream holiday too but place I proper wanna go Bahamas
Lily: Booked in then
George: We will do a holiday vlog and go to America
Lily: Not sure I could cope with you two in an RV for 3 months
George: Course you couldn’t, you’re going in a tent
James: I’d kill George
James: So what’s happening with this blog post
Lily: I’m gonna put this into a post tonight **I didn’t**
George: What exactly do you want and we will provide?
Lily: More questions!
George: Us asking or you asking us
Lily: Either, you first
James: I thought it was gonna be a meet up and chat thingy
George: You ask us for three!!! We ask you three! James we have deadlines to meet!!
James: Do we?
Lily: You can have a series James! This is just pt1
James: Would a girl prefer big boobs or a big bum
George: James we need questions that will result in an in-depth answer! Not one word
Lily: Personally rather have bum
George: Ditto Lily
James: Why do most girls wear so much makeup? I prefer less. How does a blog series work? What do we have to do?
Lily: What do you mean by ‘loads of makeup’? Give me an example, do you think I wear a lot of makeup? And we can just have regular Q and As
George: Lily you dont. We will have to meet up at some point
Lily: Yes we will, tomorrow
Lily: Next question anyway!
George: If you could meet anyone dead or alive who would it be and why?
James: It’s probably best lily if you ask us the questions you want answering and we’ll give you the average guys perspective on the matter
George: We need long answers James
Lily: What do you really not like in a girl
George: Small arse hahahahahahahhhaaaa. Lily, lets stay away from girls for the time being, ask a long question
James: George. Her blog her questions
George: True but i want to answer a full A4 page
Lily: Who inspires you and why?
James: We should do this face to face it’d be so much easier
Lily: Who do you look up to? And when then?
George: James we have no time!
James: Is the deadline actually tonight?
Lily: Come here tonight if you want, and it’s not an official one haha, I just wanted to post
George: James pick me up, I’ll bring my laptop
[Half an hour later, ‘interview’ continues face to face and Lily transcribes]
George: Where would you go if you could **George is determined we should answer this question.**
James: Roadtrip of the USA. Just Florida is same size as England, so there’s so much to see, and they’re not as fussed about health and safety as England so way better for adventures. Then the Bahamas for chilling.
Lily: Same and Scandinavia, so we basically all say an adventure holiday is ideal
James: We should have typical ladies magazine questions like ‘boxers or briefs’. Boxers all the way. I like to feel snug
James: What is Joli House?
Lily: My blog…
James: Yeah but I mean where did the name come from
Lily: *insert answer here*
George: You have three women to invite to a dinner party, who would you invite and what would you cook? And one of them has to be over 40
James: I know it’s superficial but the 3 I think are the most beautiful
Lily: Your honesty is refreshing
James: [After deliberation and unrepeatable comments] Taylor Swift, Kendall Jenner, Nigella Lawson, Chloe Moretz. She’s not classicly pretty but something about her is beautiful.
George: Rosie Huntington-Whitely, Sandra Bullock, Emily Ratajkowski. Or Jen Selter.
George: What would you cook though?
James: Beans on toast
George: No that’s not acceptable, say what you’d pick if you had to order the same thing for them all from a fancy restaurant or something
James: OK if we’re all eating the same then I’ll pick what I want, so soup of the day (always a good bet) followed by lobster. I’ve always wanted to try lobster. I don’t really know fancy food!
Lily: What is it about Taylor Swift?
James: She’s just amazing isn’t she? Very beautiful, looks like she’s kinda weird, still actually goes round to friends houses and hangs out like a normal person
Lily: Kendall or Kylie?
George: No Kylie!
**Can’t remember this bit, something was funny and I forgot to scribe for 5 minutes**
James: All I need is love and affection, I’m literally like a puppy. I’ll sit through French Opera if that’s your thing if you give me love and affection.
Lily: Festivals and getting ‘close’ – would you do it?
George: Yes I f***ing would, you’re both smelly so doesn’t matter. Living young wild and free [Waves arms in air]
James: Right this is gonna sound really bad, but there’s this girl that pops up to me all the time, and she’s like a 3/10 in my perspective. I never ignore her ’cause that’s just rude and mean. But she pops up at midnight on a Saturday asking if we have any homework…
Lily: What do you make of girls making a first move then?
James: OMG absolute dream. I have no game, I’m fiercely afraid of rejection, and it’s just too nerve wracking.
Lily: Doesn’t come across too forward then?
James: No no no, it’s the absolute best. I’ve never popped up first ever. Girls I go for are out of my league anyway, I punch above my weight.
[Insert discussion of exes that won’t be repeated ’cause that would be mean]
James: ‘She was a mistake’.
James: Why don’t more girls pop up first?
Lily: The fear of having a group of lads talking about you and laughing, really.
Lily: What about a girl making the first physical move?
James: Again a dream, takes the nerves away.
Lily: What if you didn’t fancy her?
James: I wouldn’t reject someone that would just be too embarrassing and horrible. I’d kiss her back. Can you imagine that kind of rejection though? My confidence would be crushed if that was me, I’d go hide in a dark room and cry for a week. I’d save them the embarrassment. You’d rather just not be asked for a second date than get physically rejected on the spot wouldn’t you? Films are so misleading. They make everything look so easy. High school sweethearts? Fuck right off, that happens for like 1 in 1000.
James: What’s your ideal girl?
George: Any colour hair, nice bum, could be completely flat chested, long hair
James: Yeah same, couldn’t do short hair
Lily: Why not?
James: It’s more feminine
George: They’ve got to like dogs and Ben & Jerry and ice cream, and like beer and rugby erm…
Lily: Do you like waking up with a girl?
James: Yes it’s amazing, waking up at 4am, all groggy and sleepy, turning around and seeing her there like ‘wow’. It’s such a nice feeling having someone else there that you love. Like the nicest moment in life, that something as simple as sleeping can feel that great with someone there, that you love. Not with a randomer though, not that I’ve done that. And now I’ve had it, it’s shit when you’re on your own.
George: I found my dream girl in Spain. She was working at the tennis counter. She’s called Vanessa. Anyway I want to answer some proper questions!
James: You just have a big mouth, or I can articulate better.
Lily: Is the thrill of the chase a ‘thing’?
James: Never really had a chase.
Lily: What confuses you most about girls?
George: Moodswings and hairgrips.
Lily: What do you think of girls who post loads and loads of pictures of themselves?
James: If it’s of themselves, fine. If it’s just food, piss off. Then again all selfies would be pretty boring and can get annoying if they’re not very pretty – don’t put that in!!! I’m so superficial but you can’t deny that looks matter. I’d still be friends if I didn’t think they were pretty, and once you have the attraction then you would dig deeper.
Lily: Would you do things for ‘lad points’?
James: No, my group aren’t like that. I don’t care what other lads perceive me as. Life’s too short to worry about what other people think. It’s nice to please people yeah…
Lily: You’re quite old fashioned though aren’t you?
James: Is that a bad thing? I’d never brag about something with a girl to friends, I wouldn’t act like it’s a conquest. You know, I hope I have a son one day… if I have a girl I’m gonna cry. If you have a baby girl, you have every dick in the world to worry about, if you have a baby boy, you only have one to worry about. Well, besides your own. I know it’s double standards but she’s my little girl!
George: Ooh it’s my dad. Leave it
Lily: What would hurt you the most?
James: Being cheated on. By someone you were in love with. Make sure you put that bit in, it’s important. Even just a kiss would hurt so badly. I’d quite happily chop off my left testicle for someone I was in love with.
Lily: Older girl or younger?
James: At this age, only a year either way.
George: 3 years above.
Lily: What about being our age and going away to uni and stuff- would it stop you getting together with someone?
George: I’d try to not let it, but it would.
James: If it was really serious like you could genuinely see yourself marrying them in the future then yeah, you should do everything to make it work. If it’s not that serious then let it go, fate might bring you back together, cliche as that sounds. Don’t stop your life just cos they went away.
[James and George have to leave – interview ends]
Anybody have any more questions for George and James?
lily kate x